Do You Even Know Me or I You?

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FBTruthFooling

I saw the quote above & as much as I think about this a lot, I don’t write about it that much. I have a couple of times over the years but not recently.

We see so many Facebook & Instagram & blogging posts about be true to yourself, being authentically you, revealing the YOU. I am guilty of it too although in my defense, I always make note that I am a work in progress always! I do not hide that I have plenty of past demons that led me to who I am today… and I am still working to “recover”, get over, put in the past all the stuff that held me & still holds me back. I am much better than I was BUT I have a way to go still.

Honestly, I am not sure I will ever be able to say with truth that I am completely happy with myself, love myself for all my good & my flaws. YES, we all have flaws but that is what makes us who we are – they are a good thing in that is makes us all different, “REAL”, vulnerable yet approachable & alive! Personally, I love a person that is willing to show & admit these “flaws”… because they are really not flaws but just YOU, ME… it is us!

So in that quote at the beginning of my post – I don’t think it is that we are fooling anyone.. I think it is a protective mechanism we have used to protect ourselves from past hurts, pains, past experiences we have considered “failures” but are really just part of life lessons & struggles.

There are a lot great people in the blogging & social media world! I have met amazing people & friends!! BUT, there are also a lot of clicks & other stuff in social media & the blogging world. I think some of that brings back the past that has haunted us – that past we thought we had rid from ourselves. The key is to try to separate that stuff from YOU – it is not about you, it is about them! Hard but necessary to do!

So, always know that those that stick by you through the hard times, those times when you become that person fooling yourself and everyone else – the ones that see thru the pain to the truth – those are the ones that are true friends!!

I first posted this quote below at least a year ago if not more. It is so true! We really have no idea what is going on under the surface of happiness or sadness or just everyday emotions of those we know as friends or acquaintances or co-workers or any person we meet out & about during the day. That person may be fighting a personal battle that they are hiding from others. Remember kindness always….

FB BeKind

So.. do you think you really know me? Do you know you?Β 

Does this make you think twice about assumptions you have made about others along the way?

Life experiences, life lessons, LIFE!!!! Let’s all be a bit more patient along the path of life.. πŸ™‚

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27 Comments


  1. (((SHARING)))
    Ive made some life long dear friends through social media.
    and met people offline where I thought WAIT WHAT?? YOURE NOTHING LIKE ID ANTICIPATED.

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    1. Yes you have Carla!!! I wonder if it was different too when you first started & less people doing what you do – finding friends. Sometimes I am very nervous about the agenda of others these days.

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  2. I love that first quote so much. I definitely think it’s partially a defense mechanism to try to hide the pain. But for me, it’s also a bit about perfectionism, not letting anyone down so that means always trying to be there for others, a cheerleader on call 24/7 so much that I forget to care for myself and my own feelings. And also it hurts less when I deny it all so that if someone fails to come to my side, well, I never let anyone know right? I don’t know that we can ever TRULY know someone through and through, but we can come pretty close. I think that you are fairly transparent. You don’t try to hide anything. I appreciate that.

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    1. Thx Heather! I so agree about not wanting to let others down.. and yes, just not revealing things we need – I might surprise you on how much I keep bottled up! πŸ™‚

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  3. Funny how you get impressions of someone through their social media shares… for instance, there is a particular person who really puts me off because she constantly share ‘cute’ pics of herself in a variety of situations and she comes across to me as very self-promoting and annoying. I am sure others don’t see it that way at all but it tends to color all my contact with her.

    I think we don’t really know each other at all unless we have personal face to face contact as well.

    Interesting post, Jody.

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    1. Thx for your comments Elle! I always like the face to face. These days in social media, I am not sure who I can trust anymore – kinda pessimistic but…

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  4. Certainly it’s possible to be authentic yet still choose to reveal only parts and aspects of oneself. Honestly, if someone were to share 100% of herself/ himself day in and day out online, I would feel overwhelmed. And I have found that knowing someone solely online vs in-person makes a huge difference! I always feel much more of a connection in person. Hugs, Golden One!

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    1. Agree Kymberly – I hear ya on your comment! I like the in person too!!!!

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  5. Personally I think I find more “agendas” flying around social media in the past couple of years than I did when I started my blog 5+ years ago. I guess it’s become more of a “profession” which isn’t a bad thing, but networking doesn’t work when all one is doing is to try to serve oneself. Does that make sense?

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    1. That is what I think Marcia – more agendas in the past couple years.. thank goodness for the good peeps! πŸ™‚ And yes, your comment makes sense!

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  6. Well, I think people only know what you show of them – and that includes in real life as well as on line. I think I am pretty much as I am online, but I don’t share everything on social media. I don’t try to portray myself as perfect and I hope I don’t come across that way.

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  7. Love your straight from the heart post, Jody!

    When I look back at my columns on CalorieLab from many years ago, I see YOUR comments there! Almost all of the other commenters are either gone, or more likely, do not have blogs any more. You are one of only the two people who I met doing this online and have talked to on the phone πŸ™‚

    Yes, I know you, because I know you straight from the heart!

    I know myself too. Most days I can look myself in the mirror and be very okay, but not every day.

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    1. Thx Dr, J!!! Yes, people come & go… I may be gone more than here with work assignments but I try to keep up… we shall see…. πŸ™‚ I understand your last sentence.. one I work on every day is a work in progress for me though! Need to get thru that zodiac crap! πŸ™‚

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  8. I don’t like the cliques and don’t belong to any blogging groups. I try my hardest to remember why I started blogging and keep it that way. At the end of the day, I’m most interested in connecting with the person, not the person’s blog. Does this make sense? Hopefully I’m explaining myself right. Twitter has changed so much and it’s sad. It’s all about self promotion. Yes, I do tweet my latest post, but beyond that, I’m just wanting to have good conversation with the people. And that’s lacking lately. The social media climate has changed. I’m finding lately that some of my (formerly) favorite blogs have back to back promotional pieces for this company or that one. Great post, Jody! And thanks for staying authentic. XO!

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    1. Josie, I see you don’t & that you just do your own thing – love that!!! AND YES, your comment makes sense!!!! I have never done a ton of Twitter beyond tweeting my stuff.. I just never liked how short I had to keep my thoughts. πŸ˜‰ Plus it is so time consuming! FB is great but once again, it is time consuming & get caught up there for hours. I love that people have great conversations & I wish I had time to keep up with it but I don’t… I do some promotional stuff too but try to balance it & at least when I do it, I am honest about it OR I just have brand love for the brand I write about. πŸ™‚

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  9. i try my hardest not to be too negative but also be real. It’s hard to do both in balance, but those who really “get” us will have compassion and always support. I know we would be IRL friends. Maybe we can meet someday friend

    p.s.
    I try to ignore cliques. It’s just not my thing. We are all the same

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    1. Lindsay – SO GET that balance of real but not negative!!!! I want to write a post about something but I know it will be viewed as being bitter or negative – but to me, it is just reality…. I love that you wrote about the compassion – yes, many of us get the behind scenes of this world…

      I used to feel bad about the cliques. Now I just move on or just do my thing & not worry about it. πŸ™‚

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  10. This post made me think about the online friends I’ve had the chance to meet in real life. Surprisingly, most of them have been exactly the person I expected from their online personalities. I don’t know if it’s perhaps that I’ve just had good luck in the friendships that I’ve pursued or that I’ve had the sense not to pursue those that seemed superficial or ‘fake’. You and I still need to meet in real life. I know that you’ll be one of the ‘real’ ones! xo

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    1. Tamara – yes, many great people out there… it is wonderful to meet some in person! I am hoping I live up to your expectations of me.. I hide a lot of dirt down deep though.. πŸ™‚

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  11. This post made me think about the online friends I’ve had the chance to meet in real life. Surprisingly, most of them have been exactly the person I expected from their online personalities. I don’t know if it’s perhaps that I’ve just had good luck in the friendships that I’ve pursued or that I’ve had the sense not to pursue those that seemed superficial or ‘fake’. You and I still need to meet in real life. I know that you’ll be one of the ‘real’ ones! xo

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  12. Funny – just this week as I was working through my blog list, I started noticing a group of bloggers that I enjoy following but that only seem to follow the others in the group. I get the sense of connection that you can feel but I do see cliques even in the blog world. Fortunately, I feel like I do know myself and I’m OK with commenting when I have something to say even if I’m not part of a group:)
    I hope that one day we get to meet – I think that you would be exactly as I have pictured you!!!

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    1. Kim, yes, there are that only follow some…. they also check to see how comments & doesn’t & base what they do on that… I don’t have the energy for that. I don’t check to see who does & does not so this or who unfollows me – just not worth it to me! πŸ™‚

      I see you as VERY VERY REAL!!!! πŸ™‚

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  13. I think I know myself pretty well. And I definitely don’t think I know others thoroughly. That is why I like to make long-term friends – so I can learn more as time passes.

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    1. Alexandra, you & Kymeberly are so real – in the social media realm & real life!!! Like you, I am just not sure these days on who people really are BUT some, I think I know & that is a good thing!

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  14. I love this post. I have been struggling to find myself again. It’s tough when you do lose yourself and even tougher to admit it. Sure most days the smile is a bit forced but it’s to protect myself. I pretty sure I am not fooling anyone especially those who have taken the time to reach out to me.

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    1. Thx Natalie!!! I know you have been struggling – life certainly throws us curve balls! I always wonder how you really feel under that beautiful smile on IG since I know you have so much going on! HUGE HUGS!!!!!! I always want to tag you on certain of my IG posts but then I think – well, I am telling everyone else you need this. πŸ˜‰

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  15. Ugh! Do I know you? Do I know my best friend? Really? Fully? No! Am I supposed to? I enjoy people. I really listen to what they say but, I don’t feel I need to fully know and understand them. I wonder if I’m being a bad friend by not doing that. Maybe I’m too self absorbed.
    On my end I am often very surprised by the things friends say about me as I often don’t recognize myself in the things they say. I mean yes there are parts of my personality that are impossible to miss and everybody recognizes. Interesting food for thought.

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